What to Expect From Your First Counselling Session

Before someone books their first session, there are usually a few quiet questions sitting underneath the decision. What will they ask me? Do I have to talk about everything, right from the start? What if I get upset, or cry, or do not know what to say?

These questions are completely normal. Most people have never sat in a room with a counsellor before, and the unknown can feel bigger than it actually is. So here is what the first session is actually like.

You Do Not Need to Have It Figured Out

One of the most common misconceptions is that you need to arrive with a clear story, a tidy explanation of what is wrong and why. You do not. The first session is not a test, and there is no right way to begin. Sometimes people start with "I don't really know where to start" — and that is a perfectly good place to start.

What I Will Ask

I will ask about what has brought you here, and what life has been like recently. I am not working from a checklist. I am listening for what matters most to you, and following your lead from there. You set the pace.

What If I Cry?

If you cry, that is okay. More than okay — it is often a sign that something real is happening. A first session can feel exposing, and that is not a sign that something has gone wrong. It is often evidence that you have let your guard down enough to actually be there.

There Is No Wrong Way to Do This

Some people talk a lot in their first session. Some people barely talk at all. Both are completely fine. My job is not to extract a particular kind of conversation from you. It is to be present with whatever you bring, and to help you feel safe enough to keep going at your own pace.

A Note From Sabrina Barbara

If there is one thing I most want people to know before they walk through that door, or join that first Zoom call, it is this. You do not have to have it figured out before you arrive. That is what the work is for.

You only need to be willing to begin. The rest, we figure out together.